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11/13
November,12 was the last day I felt him kick, which had been a pretty normal day. That night before bed I played there running my belly and ended up falling asleep. The following morning everything seemed normal i got the other kids ready for school, got them on the bus and then came back home and watched some tv. After a while I ended up dozeing off again and out of nowhere i was woke up by a sharp pain in my lower back, also had the urge to pee. When I stood up nothing but blood came rushing out, I knew then something was wrong. I hurried up and got my things ready to go to the hospital and then was on my way. I arrived at Dunkirk memorial hospital at around 12 and by the time they got me into the room they tried to find the ❤beat , they kept the monitor facing away from me. After a couple nurses tried they brought in a ultrasound technician and after she took one look at the screen and she then informed me there was no heartbeat. After the nurses have me a few minuets the doctor came in and went over my options with me. To me it felt like my heart an soul was being ripped out but I did give birth to him.
At first I was undecided about seeing him and holding him, but once I did catch a glimpse of him I couldn't stop. I could have spent an eternity just holding him in my arms. We washed him off and I got him dressed. After we got moved to another room, I sat there crying and talking to him , and throughout it all I could not say I'm sorry enough. No apologies would ever bring him back, and not a day goes by that we don't wish he was here. That day we also got our pictures taken from nilmdts.
After hearing that my baby was dead , it was like my whole world caved in. As if someone has put an anvil on my chest, the pain of mathew 👼leaving me so soon has and will not ever go away. I remember it like it was yesterday, an now we all still think about him everyday, Mathew you are solo much loved and everyday missed.
Thank you for taking the time to read our story and learn about our baby who will only live on in our hearts… forever. We would like to ask that you help the organization that has helped us and helps so many others in their times of need.
All donations made to this page are made in loving memory of our baby gone too soon and will be used towards the WNYPBN’s Program.