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Our Story of Love at First Sight…

It was a Saturday and i woke up wanting to get out of the house and have a date with hubby. It was unusual for me because the whole pregnancy had been pretty rough and I almost never felt well and had really not been up to going out in those last few weeks. So it was odd that morning to say the least, and i felt really energetic too (again odd).

So me and the hubby went out for a breakfast date, ran errands all around town and it wasn't till that afternoon once we were back home that he happened to say hey you haven't mentioned Sammy today. It suddenly hit me... he was right. I immediately started to panic and couldnt remember, had i felt him that morning? middle of the night? last night?? Now he had given me a scare or two in the prior months, so i had bought one of those baby heartbeat monitors. We hooked it up and i started listening. In the past it was always really easy to find his heartbeat, even at every appointment it was loud and strong. This time i couldnt hear anything. Again the panic set in harder. The hubby took the headphone and tried to find something, he said he heard a faint beat (i tried to listen but really didnt hear what he was hearing). Either way i had him do a heartrate count and it came out to 80 bpm...so with that i decided i'd call the doctor because even if that was the heartrate it was way too low i thought.

SO i called my doctors office, they said to go ahead and go to the hospital and they'd monitor me and we could get some relief. We drove to the hospital, i didnt bring anything figuring i was just being over- anxious as usual. It felt like forever while we waited for them to bring us back to the room. Finally we went back there and a nurse hooked me up to the monitor and tried to find the heartbeat....nothing. She called in another nurse, they both tried.....silence. They both decided they might as well go get the doctor and just do a full sono. The doctor came in and had the monitor pulled up , it was faced away from me so i couldnt see anything. No one said anything for what felt like years. Finally the doctor spoke....she said the phrase that i'll NEVER forget as long as i live. "Im sorry there is no heartbeat". I remember squeezing Mike's hand as hard as i could and looked at him and started crying. I dont know what else was going on around me at that point. Awhile later they said i would have to deliver... i forgot all about that aspect of things in the moment. We were taken to a delivery room and so began all the induction methods i had never wanted as part of my birth plan. almost exactly 24 hours later Sammy came out. He was perfect...they told us that he had the cord around his neck and also around his foot twice and with that we had our "reason'. We took the next whole day and stayed with Sammy, took close to 200 pictures and gave him baths and changed him a bunch of time and just held and kissed him.

Thank you for taking the time to read our story and learn about our baby who will only live on in our hearts… forever. We would like to ask that you help the organization that has helped us and helps so many others in their times of need.

All donations made to this page are made in loving memory of our baby gone too soon and will be used towards the WNYPBN’s Program.